Together with members of your group and students in other sections, you’ll be reading A Thousand Splendid Suns over the next several weeks. Although you're not required to take notes while you read, it would be wise to keep track of important events and characters for your own clarification. You are, however, expected to participate regularly and thoughtfully in an online discussion of seven essential questions.
Here's how it works:
Divide your book into two roughly equal halves. You need to have read and blogged about your book by the due dates below.
- There are two kinds of posts in this discussion: responses and comments.
- Post at least SIX responses altogether: at least THREE for the 1st half of reading and at least THREE for the 2nd half.
- You must respond to at least five essential questions over the course of your reading.
- You may respond to only two questions more than once.
- One of your six responses can be a "free response" post.
- Post at at least TEN comments altogether: at least FIVE for the 1st half of reading and at least FIVE for the 2nd half.
- Post your first three responses to the book and five comments by THURSDAY, MARCH 16.
- Post your final three responses to the book and five comments by FRIDAY, MARCH 31.
- How do the characters assert their individuality within a repressive society?
- Where do the characters find sources of inspiration in their lives?
- How are the characters affected by events/changes in society?
- How is the practice of veiling (or restrictions on dress in general) reflective of cultural attitudes toward gender roles? How do these attitudes affect characters’ lives?
- How does our cultural background shape our perception of women and the practice of veiling (or wearing a head scarf) in other countries?
- How do the characters’ personal stories expand your understanding of the societies in which they live?
- Should there be one standard for gender equality throughout the world? Why or why not?
Assessment: To earn maximum credit, post thoughtful responses that are at least a short paragraph in length—and carefully proofread! Do not misspell characters' or authors’ names! Also, be sure to include specific references to the text (either details or short quotations).
How is the practice of veiling (or restrictions on dress in general) reflective of cultural attitudes toward gender roles? How do these attitudes affect characters’ lives?
ReplyDeleteThe practice of veiling could potentially be seen as a way of turning women into an extravagant gift/materializing them. Gifts are covered and then given to certain people and then they are the only one that can open them. Just like how muslim women cover their hair so that men that are not “worthy” can’t see “them.” Also though the practice of veiling could be used to stop women from becoming too “free.” Stopping them from getting out from under the control of men within the religion and community. If they can’t show their hair in public because of fear of being shamed then how could they gather enough courage to fight for their rights. These attitudes towards women cause serious stress just like when Mariam lost her child and blamed herself because of all of her “duties.”
I see what you mean when you say that it makes the women like a gift. I had never though about it that way because I think most men fall under the second category and feel that it gives them ownership over their wife.
DeleteIf women are thought about as possessions do you think it is really even possible for them to assert their individuality because they are "just an object"?
DeleteI think that men think of them as just an object even though they are much more than that.
DeleteIt makes so much sense that the fear of being judged, makes them also fearful of speaking up for themselves and fighting for rights. This is a really good connection. Being under so much control, makes them much less likely to get any further in society.
DeleteI like your analogy between veiling and gift wrap, it's an excellent way to think about the practice. Very insightful! I also agree with what you said about the veiling making them feel less free. In the book, Mariam herself said at one point that wearing it made her feel at ease and hidden (not exactly fitting the definition of freedom)
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ReplyDeleteHow are the characters affected by events/changes in society?
ReplyDeleteOne of the major events going on in the story is the war in Afghanistan. It affects everyone living there including the characters. Because of the war many characters are forced to move away and many characters die or lose loved ones. Laila is greatly affected by the war and she loses everyone she loves. Her parents, Hasina, and Tariq are killed and Giti moves away leaving her desperately alone. People are always told to look for the positives in life but for her it's near impossible. It will take incredible strength for her to recover and continue living her life. I look forward to seeing if she can do it.
Since Laila is living within the islamic community I think it might be easier than you think because Allah is such an important person in their lives. I think Laila will probably look to Allah to guide her through her hard times.
DeleteWhere do characters assert their individuality within a repressive society?
ReplyDeleteIt's hard for all characters to assert their individuality because of the repression within society but it's especially hard for women. Men can assert their individuality through their job and through relationships they form outside of their homes. Men can also assert their individuality by joining the war. Women on the other hand don't have much of a life outside their home so it's more difficult for them. One way they can assert their individuality is through cooking and I think that's one reason why Mariam enjoys cooking at first. Another way women assert individuality is with other women. During the day women often converse and drink tea and it's during these times when they're the most free to be themselves.
Do you think that Mariam has also tried to assert her individuality by trying to put makeup on to make herself more appealing to Rasheed after her child's death?
DeleteMaybe this is a bad question but if I am interpreting correctly Mammy Laila's mother yelled at Babi Laila's father which is kind of the opposite of what we have been seeing so far is that correct?
DeleteYes I agree, Mammy and Babi's relationship seemed to be an outlier compared to the rest. Babi treated Mammy with respect and not as an object.
DeleteI didn't even think about how much easier it is for men to express themselves in a job or war. Men are able to somewhat choose what they do during their day and can meet lots of people and go lots of places where I feel that women just mostly go back and forth between the market and their homes. All women do is provide, but are barely thanked for it, when men make money and are praised for it, or fight wars and (rightfully) get recognition for it. Women are not put in a place when they regularly get praised for something or feel worthy and important.
DeleteI agree with you on what you said regarding cooking. It is definitely a means of expressing individuality, or gaining a husband's praise in Islam. Sadly, not in Mariam's case.
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DeleteI agree that it is harder for women to express themselves than men in this story. To answer Alex's question about the makeup, I feel that Mariam putting on makeup is not a way for her to show her individuality but showing that she feels she has duties as a wife, and one is for her husband to be happy with her which is what she's trying to do.
DeleteWomen have a duty to their husbands, so cooking and making themselves look good are two ways that they can ensure they're completing their wifely duties. I think it's hard for us to comprehend the lives that these women face. In many ways, it's normal to them, although they definitely seem to understand that it isn't fair or equitable.
DeleteHow is the practice of veiling reflective of cultural attitudes towards gender roles? How do these attitudes affect characters' lives?
ReplyDeleteThe practice of veiling reflects the cultural idea that the men own their wives. When women such as Mariam get married and sign the contract they are giving themselves up to their husbands and they are now treated like property. The practice of veiling reflects this idea because men don't want their prized possessions just walking around where anyone can look at them. Their wife is for their eyes and their eyes only. Women are treated like wallets. They are necessary and valuable but they are not to be flaunted in public or else you will be robbed.
Interesting interpretation Max, I really like your use of pathos to make your view that much more reasonable and well thought out. I think that this is kind of like my second interpretation of men's views of women in islamic culture.
DeleteYour connection between women and wallets is very interesting and sad. I agree with it and think that it's a very good way to describe how women are treated in that culture but the reality of it is so sad to think about.
DeleteVery true indeed! The ladies in this culture are sadly treated as possessions, as you've explained. Wonderful analogy in referring to women as wallets. It's certainly agreeable in this case.
DeleteI saw a play a few years ago that addressed the idea of veiling. I think some women are comforted by the veil while others feel oppressed by the veil. How do you think you would feel if it was your religion to wear the veil?
DeleteHow does our cultural background shape our perception of women and the practice of veiling (or wearing a headscarf) in other countries?
ReplyDeleteDue to our cultural background our understanding of veiling is limited to seeing people doing it out in public and small portion of time during school to cover it. Veiling is different to us, but put yourself in their shoes and look at Christianity or Judaism you’ll see that they are different too but also, similar. Lent the idea of giving up one thing for an extended period of time is kind of like Ramadan. Also Judaism and Islam have eating limitations in common(Kosher and Halal). Fortunately the three religions do kind of give us an understanding of the concepts and ideas behind challenges that we are asked to endure.
I like how you compared three religions to show that they're not that different from one another. I wonder though if veiling is strictly tied to Islam or if it also has to do with the region of the world they're living in.
DeleteThis is an interesting way to think about it. There truly are many differences in religions but many ways they are similar. It's a good outlook to have and makes us realize that what they're doing isn't so "weird" or different and is just a different interpretation or practice of the same type of things other religions do or believe.
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ReplyDeleteHow do the characters’ personal stories expand your understanding of the societies in which they live?
ReplyDeleteMariam’s personal story has really opened my eyes to how marriage and gender roles really work. It also has reminded me of the book I read last year “The bookseller of Kabul” which has some of the same situations embedded into the story. When Mariam was first approached by her “family” about marrying out her monologue showed a lot of isolation. Her grandmother blamed the death of her mother on her. Mariam’s inability to choose for herself in most situations and the pain and suffering she has endured because her husband told her to. I was very shocked when Mariam was asked to chew on rocks and she broke two molars. But all of that is ok because women are just an object that is expendable basically within society.
I was also shocked after reading the first part of this book and "The Bookseller of Kabul." It's sad that women don't have say in their life. One of the most shocking things to me was the age at which women married. I believe that Mariam was nine.
DeleteI could have sworn Mariam was 15, but this didn't really make the age difference that significantly different. The fact that women were/are married off at this age is appalling to Americans since our culture supports women's rights and gives them respect. When I read about the young marriage I originally only saw the bad in this, I was very surprised. When I thought of it from the Afghan culture's perspective though, I realized that this girl is very fortunate because she would be getting a house, food and a husband that is able to provide for her, others in her situation might not have the same luxury especially considering how she is a disgrace to her family.
DeleteIt has opened my eyes too. At first, when Mariam's father's wives were telling her about Rasheed, I thought that she was staying with him and that he would act as a caretaker for her. When they mentioned marriage, I was so confused and then felt awful for the poor girl being sent off to live with this middle-aged man as a teenager.
DeleteWill, you make a valid point. It is strange for us, even appalling, to see a girl married off so young, but you're right in that it provides security. Isn't hard though knowing how these women have been treated to understand life from a completely different perspective?
DeleteHow is the practice of veiling reflective of cultural attitudes towards gender roles? How do these attitudes affect characters' lives?
ReplyDeleteIt was amazing to me how much power the men had over their wives. Wives were intimidated by their husbands and do whatever they would say just so they wouldn't get beaten or etc. When Rasheed forced Mariam to wear the burqa and was so blunt about her having to wear it, she was scared and nervous, for she had never been made to wear one of those before. The ability that men have in this culture to make their wives wear and do certain things, so they can look better is crazy. At one point, Laila's father told her that she was lucky because women in the 80's had more rights than they ever had, but considering that their husbands still had so much power over them, I'm not quite sure what rights they actually had at this time and how "lucky" they were. Women can not speak or dress how they like, and are a trophy for their husbands who parade them around at times with pride - but other times hide them in fear of being judged. Women are not able to be their own person but are a product of what their husbands make them to be.
- Zoë
I also found this amazing and even more so, revolting. The way the wives and just women in general are shown to be treated in this culture makes me so thankful for the rights and culture we have to grow up in.
Delete- Riley
I think it is awe-striking when you contemplate on how at this point in time, women had more rights than ever, as you've pointed out. It still seems quite horrible if you ask me. I agree with what you've written on veiling and gender roles; it's entirely insane how women were and are treated in their culture.
DeleteHow does our cultural background shape our perception of women and the practice of veiling (or wearing a headscarf) in other countries?
ReplyDeleteParents in this culture raise girls in different ways, but a lot of parents tell their girls the same things. "Be whatever you want to be" "Women are strong, intelligent and worthy" "Men and women should be equal" In this culture most parents are not worried about whether they will have a boy or a girl, but rather just a healthy child. In Afghanistan, they want boys. To work, to carry the family name, to fight. Rasheed was set on the idea of Mariam's unborn baby being a boy, picking a name and buying clothing while it was far from being born. When we see men forcing their wives to wear certain clothing and headscarves, we just think "What the heck? Speak up to them, say no." But in their culture that is not what they do. It makes us think that men in that culture are terrible, mean humans but in reality it's how they have been brought up and it is just their culture. Now this does not mean that it is okay to punish your wife's cooking by forcing her to chew on rocks until her mouth is bloody, abusing a woman because she cannot have children or hurting a woman in any way for doing something other than what you said. But in that culture, the men and women are the way they are, because that is in their culture. Hearing about all the stories though, makes us believe that they are monsters.
And in most cases, these beliefs are completely correct.
DeleteI agree that it's terrible the way they're treated but do you think all men are like this? Babi treats Mammy much differently than Rasheed treats Mariam. I'd be interested to know what the "normal" way of treating wives is.
DeleteDefinitely not all men in the culture are like that. I wonder how many actually are...
DeleteWas the differences that we saw in the treatment of women by men different based on social status? Could that be a factor considering the men might believe they contribute more considering they make more money to support the family?
DeleteTowards the beginning of the book I remember a passage when Mariam was walking the streets with Rasheed. She talks about how there were modern men walking with modern women and the women looked at ease, with makeup on and no hijab. They carried purses and nice handbags as well. I think this shows there are few men who let their wives be individuals and possess nice objects, but they are still few and far between.
DeleteWe also have to remember that this is one story, and therefore one perspective of the Afghan society. While it may seem that all men are that way, you are right to understand that there are many men who treat women well.
DeleteWhere do characters assert their individuality within a repressive society?
ReplyDeleteCharacters show their individuality it seems mostly to me, in their own gender groups. Mariam could not wait for Rasheed to leave the house everyday so that she could let off her guard and be herself. When their husbands are around they cannot make mistakes. Dinner must be ready on time, children must be had, the house must be clean, the list goes on and on. But when they are alone, at home with the children or with the other wives, they tell stories and laugh and talk with another freely. The men too, I believe feel this way. When Rasheed had friends over to celebrate the unborn baby, Mariam was to go upstairs and keep to herself. Downstairs, the men drank and listened to music and spoke about the past and future. When men and women are together however, they act completely different. Women are quiet and "behaved" and keep to themselves where men are loud and demanding and controlling over their wives. It seems that everyone is much happier among their own gender.
There are some exceptions to this though, like Mariam and Mullah Faizullah. The two learn from one another, have great conversations and he is the closest Mariam has ever been to someone. I think this is a last resort type deal for a child when this is all they have for a connection. Another exception is Laila and Hakim. Their relationship is strong because they are both smart people, and Laila's mother is not emotionally or mentally stable, meaning that as a child, this is the only person that she can connect with. Men like this are also very different than what seems to be the society norm.
I agree with you but I also want to point out that I think children are much more open and kind with one another. For example Tariq and Laila have a very strong relationship before they're split apart. I think that the same thing is still true today- children have much more open minds. This way of treating females is something that men develop as they get older by observing those around them and growing up in that environment.
DeleteI agree but then there are also children like Khadim and his friends who are attacking women already as children. Maybe that occurred for another reason though (issues between families, past friend issues, etc.)
DeleteIt made me think when you said people there feel more comfortable in their own gender groups. It makes me think about how it can very often times be the opposite case in America. That makes me feel lucky to be here indeed.
DeleteChildren learn from those around them.
DeleteHow do the characters’ personal stories expand your understanding of the societies in which they live?
ReplyDeleteWhile reading the stories of the individuals in this book, I realized many differences between the two societies. It seems that the roles are divided up and the line is never tested. The line between male and female that is. All throughout the 210 pages that I read, a pattern emerged. Women would always be cooking, cleaning, tending to the children, tending to their husbands and sometimes treating themselves or gathering with other women, but that was less common. The men always seemed to be going off to work and providing for their families or visiting with other men/families. It was rare to see any crossing over. Comparing this society to ours is almost like night and day. This is probably why any reader who lived in a similar society to ours would see these men as monsters and gasp as they read. Our society contains equal rights for the most part. This goes for gender, race, sexuality, etc. and to see how these Afghan families function lets us conclude that their society is corrupt (which it is), but the way those families see it, the abuse and inequality is normal. After we read the personal stories of these characters, we understand how stubborn their society is and how little power the women have.
I like your points that show how different are two societies are. Another part of the book that shows this is when Rasheed has other men other for a party he tells Mariam to go stay in her room and not make noise until they leave. To us in America this sounds absurd and abusive. But to Mariam she welcomes and is glad that Rasheed tells her to do this, because it's a sign he respects her.
DeleteHow do the characters' personal stories expand your knowledge of the societies in which they live?
ReplyDeleteIn the beginning of the “A Thousand Splendid Suns” Mariam's abusive relationship with her mom is shown vividly. Mariam’s “Nana” made her feel as scum under her feet and a burden to deal with. When Nana kills herself and Mariam ultimately has to end up marrying Rasheed she goes on about how she misses her mom and wants to be back with her, as opposed to living with her forced new husband. This shows that in the society these girls grow up in they are treated so poorly by men that Mariam would rather deal with an abusive mother.
I'd agree that the men in this society are abusive. I mean rocks? What the heck Rasheed? I'm not sure about her wanting to go back to her mother though. I may be wrong, but I'm quite sure that Nana was Mariam's mother and she killed herself because of "a Jinn". I did notice though that Mariam didn't mind her mothers harsh words. Mariam actually accepted the things her mother accused her of or called her and blamed herself for the death of Nana. I wonder why? Was this because her mothers words had convinced her?
DeleteI definitely think she had accepted her mothers words and were convinced they were true. I think as Mariam accepts her fate of living with Rasheed she does not wish to go back to her mom but in the beginning she did express how she missed her old life with her mom. The way I interpreted "a Jinn" was something her mom had just used an excuse for her unpredictable behaviors and not something that actually would take over her... I could be wrong though?
DeleteA jinn in their language I believe refers to a demon or something inside a person. In this case though, I believe "a jinn" refers to her mothers spasms. My belief of this is based on the fact that her spasms were mentioned when she talked about her first marriage.
DeleteHow are the characters affected by events/changes in society?
ReplyDeleteThe war and more specifically the death of Laila's brothers, Noor and Ahmed, affected her indirectly. The war and thought of danger of her sons put Mammy through greats amount of stress and threw her into a deep depression that would result in her forgetting to do basic tasks like bathe and pick Laila up from school. After the death of her sons this depression worsened to the point that Mammy would not leave her bed. This caused Laila to become more independent and take on more tasks that she previously have had. This causes her to expand on the maturity that she already possessed.
I see what you're saying about the war affecting her indirectly for a time but I feel that the entire war had a direct effect on all Afghans. It shaped their lives and changed the way they lived.
DeleteHow is the practice of veiling (or restrictions on dress in general) reflective of cultural attitudes toward gender roles? How do these attitudes affect characters lives?
ReplyDeleteThe practice of veiling/restriction on dress shows that the role of woman in traditional afghan society is to serve as a wife to their husband and nothing else. And that a wife to a husband is precious and no one else's business, as Rasheed explains to Mariam throughout the story. This affects different woman in different ways. To Mariam, the veil is comforting. a "one way window" as she describes it. A way that she can observe the world without revealing to the world the shame of her past. Other woman, such as Fariba, who wear no restrictions most likely feel suppressed by the restrictions, and treated differently by more traditional people, such as Rasheed. This can be seen when Rasheed warns Mariam to stay away from r because she walks around in public uncovered and without her husband.
I agree with your point that some women in this society like wearing veils and others choose not too. The sad part is that when women who do not want to wear a vail are forced too. This is a problem with our society though, we associate women covering up as being oppressed by men, when really lots of these women are proud to cover u[ because it represents there cultural and religious beliefs.
DeleteHow does our cultural background shape our perception of women and the practice of veiling (or wearing a head scarf) in other countries?
ReplyDeleteAs American's a major aspect of our culture is freedom, the freedom of speech, religion, etc. And the freedom of what a person can wear, as long as the outfit doesn't break any laws that is. So as Americans, when we see a woman in a headscarf for religious reasons, we associate that with oppression of woman. In some and maybe even most cases that is true. Woman in muslim countries are very often suppressed and discriminated against. However some women wear their veils proudly and do not feel oppressed or forced by anyone to wear it. This is their religious and cultural beliefs. I believe that we should remember that not all veils and restrictions of dress is oppressive to the woman, and that the decision of whether or not a woman would like to embrace these restrictions is unfortunately not always their own, even though that decision should be.
I'm glad you've brought this up. It is very true that there are many women who wear their headscarfs proudly under their own free will. It is important not to associate their dress with oppression all the time, though unfortunately that is sometimes the case. Great point!
DeleteHow do the characters personal stories expand your understanding of the societies in which they live?
ReplyDeleteI understood that having a child out of wedlock was seen as a sin in countries and cultures such as the one Mariam grew up in, however I did not understand the actual severity of this sin. Not only was the mother of the child shunned but also the child. This perplexes me. The child did not choose to be born, and did not choose to be born into a life where she would be disgraced and disowned by her family. So why would the child also be exiled and seen as disgusting by other people, for something that her mother did, and that she had no choice in the matter. However I do not decided societal and cultural practices and norms.
I agree that the title given to her is unfair. She had no choice, but I think she is shunned because she is the symbol of the sin that her father and mother committed which is why she is a disgrace.
DeleteI agree that it's unfair in their society that the child is also shunned. What I find even more unfair that really reflects on the cultural they live in, is that the father didn't face much ridicule and he was the one who sent them away to protect himself, when he took part in the deed too.
DeleteHow do the characters assert their individuality within a repressive society?
ReplyDeleteThe Afghan society is not a very diverse one. Most of the individuality would come from the men who predominately can have different personalities, interests, jobs. The women can have some individuality but these differences are mostly based on the husbands ideals. If the husband believes the wife needs a hijab then she will wair one, the wife will cook what the husband wants, etc. The most variant in women is perhaps the color of their hijab/dress or their size. The rest of their skin is mostly covered in public so their diversity is very limited. Mariam shows her individuality to others very rarely. She tried some make up and she went to the tandoor without a hijab on but that was about it since she stopped after Rasheed's personality changed. I wonder if she will try to express herself later on.
This is true, woman are represented through their husbands and not their own actions. Like Mariam is seen as isolated and reclusive, this is partially do to her own personality but also because of Rasheed's traditional beliefs in a society moving towards modernism
DeleteAnd even when women do seem to show individuality, it's often to please their husbands. You mention Mariam trying makeup, but she just did this to try to please Rasheed, because she felt he was unhappy with her.
DeleteWhat do you mean when you say that Afghan society is not very diverse? Do you think maybe they could be diverse if they were allowed to express themselves?
DeleteShould there be one standard for gender equality throughout the world?
ReplyDeleteI think having a universal gender equality standard through the world would be more than ideal. Having equality between genders could save so much abuse from happening in less modernized countries. Girls would not be forced to marry young or treated as less than men etc. Though I think this would be ideal I think it would be very hard to bring to fruition. There would be many societies fighting against having equal rights for different reasons, including religion. Placing an act like equality across the whole globe would take years upon years and is probably not realistic.
I see what you mean but keep in mind that many things happen gradually. Do you think that it's not worth it because it won't happen all at once?
DeleteNo, I definitely think just because it would be a difficult act to imply it would still be worth it. Every human being deserves to be treated equally no matter the amount of time it takes.
DeleteI believe that it would be worth it, if reaching gender equality worldwide was even a possibility. With so many different cultures, religions, and roles, theres no feasible or reasonable way to achieve such a goal.
DeleteShould there be on standard for gender equality throughout the world? Why or why not?
ReplyDeleteOf course there should. The main goal of anyone with a decent set of morals is to have equality in all aspects throughout the entire world. No one person is better than another for how they are born, that includes, where, why, when, ethnicity, gender, sexuality, religion, everything. Gender equality is not only just morally sound but also gives more opportunities to everyone, not just a minority (I'm not sure if there is any culture's in which women are seen as better to men, thats why I said minorities.) When everyone has a voice, there is more voices, which allows for a better ideas and propositions to occur that benefit everyone.
I definitely agree. To say you do not want equal rights between human beings is like saying you don't think everyone has the right to breathe, it just isn't right. The more voices that can be heard, the more changes can be made for all people not just majority groups and you're right, that would definitely benefit everyone.
DeleteHow does our cultural background shape our perception of women and the practice of veiling (or wearing a head scarf) in other countries?
ReplyDeleteThe belief that goes along with America is freedom. Women in America fought long and hard for their rights so now that the rights for all are accepted, seeing a country with less right for women is aggravating to Americans. As a representative of our culture, I believe the veil or headscarf to be like a leash or a cage. As the Afghan people find this moral, I find it to be a way of making women feel less powerful and making them feel like an object that a male owns. I find that the headscarf is the way that men keep their women to themselves and keep other men from looking at them and getting ideas. Our cultural background makes us think of the special requirements women have to endure to be unfair and this is because of belief in the importance of equality.
Wow, I never thought of relating this back to women fighting for their rights in America. I definitely agree though! To see women oppressed in other countries can be hard to understand but frustrating. I definitely see where you're coming from with headscarves making women feel less powerful, but I also think there are a lot of women who wear them and feel empowered because of their religion and the headscarf that comes with it.
DeleteI agree with Riley, there are many ways a women can interpret veiling. Including the two that you both mentioned and also the feeling of protection that Mariam experienced when wearing a veil.
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ReplyDelete**Free Response
ReplyDeleteThough I agree that the society has created a harsh environment for women to live in, I think in some way the society has helped them have something to turn to. The strong Islamic roots of the communities gives the girls something to turn to when they feel they have nothing else. For example, when Mariam has a miscarriage one of the first people she turns to is "God" blaming him and using it as an outlet for her frustration. When the women feel as if they have no reason to get out of bed, it comes time for them get up to pray. A little bit of drive from their faith can help keep them motivated.
Should there be one standard for gender equality throughout the world? Why or why not?
ReplyDeleteThere should be gender equality because there should be no reason that women should be treated any different from men. Women can do anything that men can do so why should society put them into a box. Without women, the human race dies. Women are the birthmothers of the children of this world. They not only give birth to children but they do so much more. So why should their power be suppressed? I feel that as an american it would only make sense that I would vote for equality, but this is just how my society has made me feel. I'm not sure about every body but I feel that giving women equal rights around the globe would not hurt anyone.
I think you make a good point that your society has made you feel that way. You say that women can do everything that men can do which is correct but I feel that it's too broad. Everyone is good at different things. Some men can do things that other men can't do and some women can do things that other women can't do. No matter what people can and can't do they deserve to be treated with respect.
DeleteHow is the practice of veiling (or restrictions on dress in general) reflective of cultural attitudes toward gender roles? How do these attitudes affect characters’ lives?
ReplyDeleteVeiling shows that, in this culture, women are seen as objects and not as people. The women have less power in this society. Mariam is affected by this because when she is wed she has no power to do what she wants. This is mostly because this is usually how marriages are carried out but the veil seemed to make Mariam feel like she was an object which could have been the reason why she didn't object. The headdress actually benefitted Mariam though. Some women thought of it as a burden or a way that men could control them but Mariam saw it as "one way glass" where she could see the world but the world couldn't judge her. The hijab allowed Mariam to be more confident in public and helped her be less stressed out.
I agree that Mariam felt more comfortable in the hijab. Laila also felt this way the first time she wore her hijab but do you think they'd still want them if it were a different situation? I think they liked the hijab because it saved them the embarrassment of being seen in their situation.
DeleteAn view on veils as a woman seems very situational. I'm sure that in cases some women feel that they're just practicing their religion, and get spiritual value out of it, while others like in Mariam and Laila's case feel safe and protected by the veil. Then there are other women that probably feel that they can't express themselves and feel repressed, and I'm sure there are many other views that only the women who are veiled can really understand
DeleteHow are the characters affected by events/changes in society?
ReplyDelete-Throughout the course of the book, the characters are living amidst a war. This lifestyle entails both physical and emotional destruction, through constant fear, unknown casualties, and unpredictable loss. On page 173, Hosseini showed his readers that fear in motion; “It wasn’t so much the whistling itself, Laila thought later, but the seconds between the start of it and the impact. The brief and interminable time of feeling suspended. The not knowing. The waiting. Like a defendant about to hear the verdict.” You can practically feel the stress resonating through the author’s words. Laila’s mother has been largely affected by this war; in between loosing her solider sons, and the constant grief. Hosseini depicts her as an introvert in her mourning, staying in bed, picking her hair out, etc.. Tariq’s father has also endured immense stress, which affected his heart to the point of being forced to move away with his family. Their homeland at the time was harmed immensely, and her people as well.
-Victoria L-A
I like how you mention some of the minor characters like Laila's parents. As readers I feel like we get hyper focused on the main characters stories and hardships, that we tend to over look some of the side stories and how important they are to character development.
DeleteWhere do the characters find sources of inspiration in their lives?
ReplyDelete-One small example of when Mariam found her inspiration, was from the women at “chicken street” on page 75; “These women mystified Mariam. They made her aware of her own lowliness, her plain looks, her lack of aspirations, her ignorance of so many things” I feel like they made her feel discouraged, but in a way simulated her thoughts on how things could be different for her as it was for them. In a way, I suppose that contributed to her idea of individualism.
-Victoria L-A
Should there be one standard for gender equality throughout the world? Why or why not?
ReplyDelete-I do not believe in the notion of gender equality, but of the equality of all things. Why stop at gender? Young and old, weak and powerful. We are all one in the same species, holstering our own beautiful, diverse souls on this earth. To answer the question, I believe we as humans should all remain upon a common standard of understanding, entirely excluding gender and the wee things. “All men were created equal” to me, I see that quote as all humans- both men and women alike. “The daffodils and daises within a grassy field both receive equal, tender care from the bees, no matter their deformities. Because to the bees they are all flowers with the pollen to fuel a beautiful world.”
I agree, you definitely shortened and simplified and made it easier to understand the point I was trying to get at when I answered the same question.
DeleteHow are the characters affected by events/changes in society?
ReplyDeleteOne of the largest events that caused the most change for Mariam was her mom hanging herself. This caused Mariam to realize how much are mom meant to her all that her mom did to help her. This also came when Mariam was driven home from her dads house and she had just realized that everything her mom had been trying to tell her had been true. This was a time when she needed her mom the most and she wasn't there. Mariam feels that her mom hanging herself was her fault for leaving to see her dad. This point in Mariam's life was the point at which she started to go downhill, and was the last day of her freedom.
I agree that the death of her mom was devastating but do you really think it was "the last day of her freedom?" I don't think she had much freedom to begin with and in some ways her mom held her back by saying those things.
DeleteI think in a way Mariams mom was restricting her from freedom with the things she said to her and way she treated Mariam. Although I also agree she was a little more free with her mom than she is with Rasheed because at least her mom would not lock her in a shed or make her chew rocks etc. for being disobedient.
DeleteIt is also interesting to notice that in adulthood, Mariam remembered the words that her mother always told her, that she never really payed attention to when she was a child. Her speaking about how a man will always find a way to blame a woman.
DeleteHow is the practice of veiling (or restrictions on dress in general) reflective of cultural attitudes toward gender roles? How do these attitudes affect characters’ lives?
ReplyDeleteVeiling and other dress restrictions for women make the women seem like they are owned by their husbands. In the book it will say things like "your face is only for your husband to see" and that it's a disgrace for women to show skin in public. The fact that it's okay for males to show skin in public shows the level of superiority some of the males in there society feel over the women and their wives. They feel their wives are a possession there to cook, clean, and bear children. This is all shown in the way that women are dressed.
It's sad how much say the men have over women and how in some situations women will do anything, just so they don't have to face another beating. It's also interesting to see how different the cultures are, and how in Afghanistan, that was the norm and in the U.S people are arrested and locked up in jail for what seems minor compared to beatings that occur in Afghanistan.
DeleteShould there be one standard for gender equality throughout the world? Why or why not?
ReplyDeleteI feel that people shouldn't have to act one way or expected to something based on their gender, age, race, or the religion they follow. I wish that this was the case. A world were people didn't judge people before they even know them and a world where all people are equal. I feel that this would look different in different cultures that have different customs. But that people should all have the same chances and not be looked down at or have some people feel that they're superior to others.
I agree with you it is very appalling how people are treated based on their age, race, and/or religion.
DeleteFree Response: What is the Afghan view of terrorism?
ReplyDeleteTerrorism has greatly affected the US and the people living here. It is unfortunate however that we are scared of an entire religion rather than just the radicals. There are radicals in every religion and muslim radicals are no different. Majority of the Afghan and Muslim people are just as scared as we, Americans, are. This is shown in the book when they are watching the planes crash into the twin towers on TV. They are all scared and wondering what it going to happen next. There are many innocent and loving Muslims and we need to remember that when we blame the actions of some on an entire religion.
This is a little bit different in terms of the people affected but it's just like the Japanese internment camps we created after pearl harbor at the end of WW2.
DeleteYes, this is a great point. It is very important to remember that radical islam is the minority, however people hear about them more because they do horrific things that get peoples attention.
DeleteShould there be one standard of gender equality throughout the world?
ReplyDeleteI can't think of one thing that has a standard throughout the world. All places are different and all cultures have different ideas of what's right and what's wrong. However with this said I think that all people regardless of gender should be treated with respect. Nowadays in the US there is a push for the idea that gender is a spectrum. People are male or female based on their body but inside we are not one or the other. Many behaviors and traits are associated with one gender or the other but all females are not the same just like all males are not the same. We are all people and everyone deserves to be treated with respect.
I agree with this. Cultures have such different histories and cultures so one standard among the whole world seems like it would have no hope. But I agree with you, that no matter the variation, people deserve respect.
DeleteHow do the characters' personal stories expand your understanding of the societies in which they live?
ReplyDeleteI would say that Mariam's story expanded my understanding of Afghanistan the most out of all the characters. Her story was heartbreaking and really opened my eyes to the life of a woman in Afghanistan. Just about everything that could've gone wrong went wrong for her. She lost her mother, had an abusive husband, and ended up being killed. Despite this she greatly impacted Laila and Aziza's lives and helped them to get the life that she never had. As alone as Mariam sometimes felt she knew she was never really alone and that Allah was always there. Now I understand why religion is so important in Afghan societies.
Obviously though we can't assume that all Afghani and Muslim home life is like this because we can't say for sure that this or a life without abuse are the outliers without sufficient facts.
DeleteI like the point you bring up about religion bringing solitude to a afghan women's life and that sometimes this is the only comfort she might feel at some points in life.
DeleteI totally agree. Reading this story made me so grateful for all of the rights that I have in the United States. I hope that someday every woman will get all of the rights they deserve.
Delete6) How do the characters’ personal stories expand your understanding of the societies in which they live?
ReplyDelete-Each character within the book has a powerful yet slightly different story behind them. I love how the author incorporated the stories of two people in his writing, and am glad that Hosseini chose women for both the roles. It’s true that these women receive the most strife and ridicule where they reside. Their stories, though sad, have truly gave me an insight, and strong epiphany about women’s rights and the value of equality. I’ve especially been given a sense of thankfulness for America’s common welfare for females. Reading through these comments, I can say that many of my classmates certainly feel the same way. The book was truly a learning experience, gruesome, but worth it.
The story also could have been really interesting if they showed the mans perspective. I think it could have definitely been a totally different way of seeing into the society and just how corrupt the thinking of some men actually are. Not that i didn't enjoy the stories of the women or would necessarily want to change the book, just something I think could have been interesting.
DeleteI definitely agree, Riley. It would certainly have been interesting to see into the mind of an Islamic male, and note how it differs from an American one. Perhaps there's another similar book that accounts for this. Regardless, I feel like in this book they said enough to give us an idea of their mindsets.
DeleteI also liked how the stories interconnected through the whole story. I wasn't expecting it to be like that, but thought it was really interesting when Mariam was the one that saved Laila from the bombing. It was also interesting how their struggles seemed separate and different in the beginning, but then became the same struggle in the end. It was very interesting to see it all come together.
Delete5) How does our cultural background shape our perception of women and the practice of veiling (or wearing a head scarf) in other countries?
ReplyDelete-Here, I believe we need an essence of perspective in regards to views upon veiling. It is true that in other countries, it is a norm for women to be forcefully clothed head to toe. However, it is also a Muslim custom to do so. With that in mind we cannot assume every veiled women we see, be it at a wal-mart, or far away in another country, is being obliged to wear what she is. I believe that as free Americans with a different clothing dynamic, we associate headscarfs with a long history of aggression, abuse and legal obligation, when the reality is that there are places on earth where the freedom of choice is shared. It’s incorrect to assume that every women clothed to accommodate her religious or personal moral stance has no choice in the matter, or perhaps doesn’t know what is good for her. I feel like this story that we have read, (or are still in the process of reading), can broil an essence of dislike towards the idea of modest dress, so it is very important to remember that not every women is alike to Mariam and Laila.
I agree. Just because two women in this story are having to wear the veils by force, not every women who wears a hijab or other religious clothing is being forced to. The feeling of wearing religious attire is often times empowering to women now.
DeleteWhere do the characters find sources of inspiration in their lives?
ReplyDeleteMariam finds her inspiration in life from a few places. One of them being the Koran, especially what she learned as a child. She says these verses to herself often and they help her cope with the life that she has. Mariam finds her largest inspiration in Aziza. When Aziza is born Mariam is jealous and doesn't want any thing to do with the baby, but over time Mariam creates a strong connection with the baby. Starting with the first time she held Aziza's hand and looked into her eyes. Aziza reminds Mariam of good in the world and causes Mariam to feel love for the first time in her life.
How is the practice of veiling (or restrictions on dress in general) reflective of cultural attitudes toward gender roles? How do these attitudes affect characters’ lives?
ReplyDeleteThe practice of veiling and gender roles is apparent thought the book, but is shown even more when the Taliban come into power in Kabul. They set up rules saying that a women will be beaten if she isn't wearing a burka in public and that she isn't allowed to go out in public without a male relative or she will be beaten. The women also don't have many hospitals they are allowed to go to and the ones they can go to are filthy and don't have the needed medical supplies. When Mariam and Laila try to escape they get caught and are brought back to Rasheed. The reason they were caught was because a women isn't allowed to go anywhere without a male, and they had to find a stranger to help them. Rasheed then beat them and locked them in dark rooms for days being starved, and no males in the society thought this as wrong. This really shows the difference in gender equality in Afganistan during the rule of the Taliban.
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DeleteThe hospital part was absolutely awful. I think it's crazy that the men had priority over the women when women are the ones being terribly beaten and having children, yet they had no resources or supplies to help them save the women and babies' lives.
DeleteWhy do you think the stranger told the Taliban guards that they weren't with them after he had bought the tickets?
DeleteMaybe he felt that he would get in trouble if he didn't say something or maybe felt that it was his duty. I'm not sure why he did it after he bought the tickets and they were about to board though.
DeleteOr maybe he believed the same beliefs that the Taliban had about women? It seemed odd to me though when I read it because it wouldn't have hurt him if he helped them.
DeleteHow do the characters assert their individuality within a repressive society?
ReplyDeleteCharacters, especially women are not easily able to show their individuality in a society like this. They can show it a bit in the food that they make and some of the clothes that they wear, but this is in specific situations. For example, Rasheed was so particular that his wives wear a burqa. He also did not want Mariam to show her face, and when she wore make up - which is a way to express yourself - Rasheed yelled at her, and made her take it all off. When the women are together, they share stories and laughs and are able to really be themselves when their husbands are gone. When their husbands are there however, they are very proper and quiet to keep their husbands happy. In the end, they have small ways of showing their individuality through food, and some women are able to show it through clothing, but overall, women have a very hard time showing their individuality.
I agree with everything you said, women didn't have many ways to express themselves in this society. When Rasheed stayed home for a week during some of the fighting Mariam and Laila felt even more suffocated than normal and were relieved when he finally went back to work. You bring up the point about Mariam trying makeup, but even this was just because she was trying to please Rasheed, not to express herself.
DeleteHow are the characters affected by events/changes in society?
ReplyDeleteLaila and Mariam had lots of trouble leaving their house when the Taliban was there. They were beaten - Laila especially - when she attempted to walk to the orphanage to see Aziza. They had even less freedoms than they did before the Taliban came which is hard to believe because they had so little beforehand. Women could not go out to get food, walk by themselves or really even be seen. This made their lives even more difficult because they had to work around Rasheed's schedule. As far as showing their individuality goes, they were able to show even less, become women could not walk together, or visit each others homes. Every women was at her house constantly, isolated from the rest of the world.
It's kind of like the women who have battered woman syndrome because they have also suffered long term abuse from their domestic partners but they usually aren't repressed by society or government as well.
DeleteFree response :
ReplyDeleteWhen Mariam is forced to go to prison and then die, in order to keep Laila and the children safe, it really shows how severe all of the punishments and issues in Afghanistan are. If Mariam had not taken the blame for killing Rasheed and turned herself in, Mariam, Laila and the children could have been all dead. It was also sad to see the children losing someone important to them. They both lost someone that was critical in their lives - Zalmai, his father and Aziza, Mariam. The mental health in Afghanistan and any country going through such a terrible war time must be terrible. People lose their families, their parents, their best friends and they have to get over it in order to continue surviving. The mental strength of everyone in the country has to be incredibly strong in order to get through such terrible times.
I totally agree with your point of the mental health of people being terrible. I can only imagine the toll such a gruesome society could have on people mentally. Most are probably living in constant fear and anxiety of what might happen next.
DeleteI wonder if the feeling would be mutual between women and men. We've seen the society's balance issues in gender equality so would it be true that men would not be afraid?
DeleteWhere do the characters find sources of inspiration in their lives?
ReplyDeleteLaila finds her inspiration in her children which is why it is hard when she has to place Aziza in the orphanage. I think she has finds a lot of her inspiration in Mariam who is really an older version of herself who can supply a lot more wisdom. Mariam has found most of her inspiration in the Koran which helps her deal with a lot of the problems created because she is a woman in a society where women are repressed. Also though she finds a lot of comfort with Aziza because she kind of feels like Aziza is the daughter she didn't have.
I would also say that Mariam is inspired by Laila. Laila was Mariams one and only true friend in her adult years. She lost hope being married to Rasheed so long and even thought it was a little rocky at first to say the least, Mariam and Lailas friendship inspired each other to keep fighting against oppression and for whats right.
DeleteShould there be one standard for gender equality throughout the world? Why or why not?
ReplyDeleteI think this is a hard question to answer because there are so many factors that go into creating this inequality. First, in terms of this book, religion plays such a huge part in how everyone is treated. Women are expected to cover their hair because it is almost "revealing" their body like shoulders in schools. Also governments play a big part in how people are supposed to be treated. The Taliban forced women to wear a Burqa and to stay inside and stopped them from working outside the home in most cases. In the early days of our government we sort of had the same expectations of women. Which leads me to the question. I do believe that people should be treated with the same amount of respect. Since so many factors go into making day to day life so much different gender to gender, it seems almost impossible to set an universal standard. Religion is so important to people, I would even say it is more important to Muslim women because of this inequality.
I agree with you, about how religion plays a large role and if this can really be taken into account. In my opinion, I believe that there is gender inequality when it stops being spiritual and stops holding spiritual value. This is a very hard question to answer because the moral answer and right answer is just too far out of reach to make into a reality, as you said.
DeleteI feel like we can have universal gender equality along with religion. But, like you stated, some religious beliefs make men superior to the women. This we would need to find a way to overcome. But some parts of islam, like wearing a burqa, are what some women want to do. The difference is when the women are forced to wear one.
DeleteHow are the characters affected by events/changes in society?
ReplyDeleteWhen the Taliban overtook the area in Afghanistan that Rasheed’s “family” lived life went from a four out of ten to an one. Women were already being mistreated, and we “see” it in the Mariam and Rasheed relationship and Laila with Rasheed. He made Mariam eat rocks while they were married and he flirted with a younger girl while she was standing right there. After the Taliban took over the women decided the only way to save themselves were to become refugees running from the “government” and Rasheed. When they are forced to return to him he “steps up” his tactics and starves both of them and leaves them in the dark to rot for a couple of days.
Yes, the Taliban definitely influenced Rasheed to become more violent with his punishments. I'm guessing it was mostly because of their gruesome habits but I think it also could have been because they took away the power of women.
DeleteHow does our cultural background shape our perception of women and the practice of veiling (or wearing a head scarf) in other countries?
ReplyDeleteDue to many peoples cultural background I think many people believe veiling or headscarves are a burden to the women wearing them. People who get to wear what they want everyday with little to no restrictions or requirements have a hard time wrapping their head around how someone could enjoy having to wear a veil or head scarf everyday. For so many people who wear their head scarves they feel empowered and connected to their religious community, not like they are being forced to dress a certain way.
Our culture definitely makes us wonder why the afghan women dress that way. With our fashion trends changing monthly, we americans can't understand being bound to a single attire. As for the religious part, and empowering part, young girls in America grow up seeing models and movie stars without headscarfs and strive to become like them and find empowerment in becoming a woman that turns heads instead of one that embraces religion.
DeleteWhere do the characters find sources of inspiration in their lives?
ReplyDeleteLaila definitely found so much inspiration in Aziza. For example when Rasheed locked Mariam in the shed and Laila in the bedroom with Aziza Laila was so afraid of one of them dying before the other. Laila did not want to out live her daughter but she also didn't want her daughter to have to live without her. All of Lailas love for Aziza definitely pushed her to keep waking up to make sure Aziza was still alive. When everything was just going wrong Laila definitely looked to Aziza to help her keep a brave face and push through hard situations.
I definitely agree that without Aziza that she would not have had the strength to get through those hard situations. I would also say that hope for life to get better helped drive her.
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ReplyDeleteHow do the characters assert their individuality within a repressive society?
ReplyDeleteLaila maintained her individuality in the repressive Afghani society by being obstinate. She attempted to run away, talked back to Rasheed and even hit him. She tried to maintain her self dignity while living with an abusive husband. Though she faced many repercussions, she continued to be her own person and stick up for herself when she could.
Where do the characters assert their individuality in a repressive society?
ReplyDeleteMariam and Laila assert their individuality when they run away from home and from Rasheed. This shows their independence in a society where women are completely depended on men. Women cannot work, cannot provide for their family etc. in this society. So for two women with two kids run away from their home and there husband who provides food and clothing for them (granted, Rasheed kinda sucked at the whole providing thing) independence and bravery is greatly demonstrated.
Another way that they asserted themselves in the Afghan society was when Laila stood up to Rasheed when he was going to beat Mariam. This was really the first time that a female in the book stood up to a male. This was thanks to Babi's forward thinking and his way of raising Laila to feel that she should be respected.
DeleteLike you said, women can't provide for themselves. For Laila and Mariam to flee seemed more desperate and rash than individuality. Although you are correct in saying they were trying to be independent, I feel that the women were focusing more on safety than expressing themselves.
DeleteFree Response: Why did the Mujahideen all turn on each other? I get that they all come from different ethnic groups, but they were all just fighting together to remove the soviets from Afghanistan. Why did they all turn on each other in a matter of years, destroying the country they were just fighting to protect.
ReplyDeleteHow are the characters affected by events/changes in society?
ReplyDeleteWhen the Taliban entered Kabul, the amount of power that women had dwindled to almost nothing. Women with power were stripped of it and women were morphed into pets or belongings. Although Mariam didn't have much power in the first place, she still lost quite a bit. The way Rasheed treated her was now the way that all men treated her. Also, the physical acts of violence against women were now accepted and not perceived as inhuman and therefor Laila and Mariam's home life worsened as Rasheed beat them without a second thought. It could have been that Rasheed just had an aggressive nature, but to me it seemed that this violence impacted him in a way that made his beatings on his wives more common.